Bulls ,Bears ,Tigers and Asses

Bull and bear in front of the Frankfurt Stock ...
Image via Wikipedia

Behold the once mighty Bear Sterns

One haughty, now sold for pennies in turn

Its a bear market they say,

Which made Bear Sterns fall away.

The Bulls were rampaging ,

for many a year or two.

Now its the bears turn,

to ravage me and you.

 

 

The tiger economies ,

are falling like pussy cats,

As exotic mortages ,

turn fearless men into scared rats.

In between , you will

find an occasional investment guru /ass too.

Promises to know it all, seen it all,

Pontification on TV for you.

Is this a market, we ask,

It seems like a jungle out there,

Leave us in peace, O Wise Ass,

Screw the bulls, and Kill the bear.

Politicians with pants down

How many politicians do you want to see

Cheating on their wives and then apologizing on TV

Making excuses and being sorry for what they do

Caught with pants down and then appealing to you

There was Bill , and he is now trying to get back to White house again

and Larry Craig apologized when he got caught in turn

Apparently paying for it, and getting caught

is worse than  toilet  knocks ,or having cigars with the intern

Bring back the golden days

When people had affairs discretely

Media minded their ways.

When police didnt leak,

cases like that on TV

This is getting too familiar

or is just me

Getting a man in trouble With his wife and kids

Is not enough , you have to take his job too

Daily assault on senses

Of hapless me and you.

Does the world run out of problems on those days

When politicians  get caught with the pants down

Maybe politicians should get some operations done.

Make them impotent before their tenure has begun.

The Nastiness Index

Reading about the latest back and forth and then back again rounds between not that conservative Republicans, conservative Republicans, liberal Democrats, not so liberal Democrats makes you wonder if there is some way of quantifying the daily dose of political news. If we can quantify the level of terror threat in color coding, can we create a blue and red nastiness index for quantifying the political debates in a country.

The Nastiness Index can be used to decribe political equilibrium in a country. eg in USA if the Index shows high blue , and less red it means the Democrats are pummeling the Republicans. If the Index shows low blue and low red, it means all is quiet. If it shows high red, and low blue , it means the opposition is down and the administration is up.Stock markets can use this index to quantify the level of political activity, inactivity and stability of elected governments.

If the nastiness index shows high blue and high red, it means its election time folks.

Why Wives Nag

Wives nag –

1) Because they have no one else to nag to.

2) they are trying to improve you for your own good. or change you for their own good.

3)they dont understand half the things you do…watch sports, video games,cars, etc….they are not nagging just asking

4) women try to restrict the self destructive tendencies of men.

maybe thats why the dinosaurs went extinct. their wives stopped nagging them and they ended up fighting and killing each other in the spare time.

5) its actually a sign of affection and they are just expressing themselves. They nag because men are not so good listeners. Huh…

6) behind every great man was a women …who nagged him till he became great. does not apply to men named Clinton.

7) they are socially conditioned to nag.

I mean wouldn’t it be boring if all you could do was watch sports, or hang out with the guys in peace with no one to disturb you. I mean wasn’t that the reason we get married because we get bored out of doing nothing but watching sports and hanging out with the guys.

Do not show this to your wife . If you know me, do not forward it to my wife.