50 shades of CEOs

I have met, talked, interacted, drank and ate with CEOs for a decade now. This ranges from CEOs of a few billion dollars annual revenue to CEOs of a few dollars more revenue. You can however relax on the length of article- there are NOT really 50 types of CEOs but sex sells and I thought lets write a blog post on CEOs that has subliminal connotation.

Screenshot from 2015-10-07 10:35:09

  1. The founder CEO v1 – I can code  so I can create so I created a product and they think I am a unicorn and do you feel me here,  and he is always pushing another request to git
  2. The founder CEO v2– I can sell  so I will sell and lets see what you have in your box, and boy I can sell and will kill your business monster and no I NEVER did ddduhrugs
  3. The founder CEO v3 – I can network because I can keep my mouth shut and everyone thinks I am a good guy, which I worked very hard to create as my personal brand. GOOD GUY- what a personal brand.
  4. The rack em and cash em  CEO– I cant code, sell or network but I am putting up the cash. I am the CEO, bitch – as Zuck used to say when he was  a young man before they took his innocence away and turned him into Riddick.
  5. The badass CEO -I CAN code, sell AND network and I have money but secretly think I am Steve Jobs so I will have his arrogance but not his focus.
  6. The Dormitory CEO– Got to be CEO because he happened to be in right Dormitory of right school getting drunk with the right guys in the wrong party where there were no women, and they were bouncing off ideas and one idea stuck. Notice the misogyny implicit. It is not accidental, wink wink. Also got second time lucky when people asked hey which one of us is going to be CEO, and they chose him because he talks and talks. Lean on the misogny in technology startups. Lean on.
  7. The VC CEO also known as Hand of the King-  Did not create the company, product, idea but the sorted guy cleaning up the ahem product strategy. As Game of Thrones said, The King shits and the Hand wipes.
  8. The restless CEO every three months gets a big bug in his arse about innovating and changing. Actually his ego can’t recognize his mediocrity. Actually does a very decent job of putting bread and butter on the table for the rest of the corporation. To cope with his restlessness, is sent to conference ever three month by His Board of Directors much to his chagrin
  9. The gut feel CEO  Likes to sing Black Eyed Peas in review meetings. I got a feeling. This quarter is going to be a good time. This product is going to be a good good time. Covers up his arse pretty fast (CYA) when his feelings end up diminishing the moolah for the rest of gangsters.
  10. The rolls his eyes CEO  a patient man who would have been a monk or professor in another time and age, rolls his eyes and gets his team of drama queens to play along

Do you know a CEO? Share your War Stories to CEOleaks.com Full confidentiality is assured and we have a contest. Winner gets his own T Shirt-  I am the Unicorn CEO, Switch

With a that tip to

https://www.quora.com/Whats-the-story-behind-Mark-Zuckerbergs-fabled-Im-CEO%E2%80%A6bitch-business-card

Screenshot from 2015-10-07 10:33:20

Jazz in front of Bombay Sea with Igor Butman

Serendipity, luck and sheer chut-zpah enabled me to watch from the front seat, a jazz performance by Igor Buttman and the  quartet at the NCPA , Mumbai. Most of the crowd was elderly Parsis, so I really didnt help matters by wearing a baseball hat.

The jazz was lovely. The quartet has a pianist who is blind and has golden hair, and man, he could sing too besides playing BOTH classical piano and jazz.  He needs to be taught a lesson by Butman into humility though.

an amazing blind pianist and vocalist, Oleg Akkuratov. A visually challenged boy from a small Russian town, Armavir, Akkuratov is an exceptionally talented pianist and vocalist, a unique jazz and classical musician, who participated in UNESCO’s International Choir. He has won numerous international contests and has been awarded the World Health Organization’s “Health” award, entitled “For the will to live”. At the age of nineteen Oleg outplayed many others to win the International Piano Competition in Novosibirsk.

He has performed in the Olympic Games and Para-Olympic Games, inspiring many handicapped people.

SAS livestreams it’s Government Leadership Forum

The agenda is impressive-The technology is simple

the 14th Annual SAS Government Leadership Forum

http://www.govexec.com/govexec-sponsored/2015/08/sas-government-leadership-forum-livestream/119080/

Today more than ever, data is interwoven in our lives. We know the positive, progressive things that big data enables. We’ve also seen the dark side, marked by cybercrime, fraud, privacy breaches and more. To make better decisions faster that lead to real change, it’s crucial that everyone involved in those decisions has access to the right information. SAS® makes this possible. Join us for this exciting forum to learn about all the innovative technologies that are transforming how we run government, our businesses and the world. You’ll see firsthand how SAS makes analytics accessible to everyone today to uncover new and exciting opportunities that effect real change, faster than ever thought possible.

Forum Highlights:

  • Keynote presentation by Alec Ross, former Senior Adviser for Innovation to Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and author.
  • General sessions featuring government and SAS executives on fast-evolving analytical technology and how it’s changing our world.
  • Breakout sessions on best practices and stories of innovation in fraud and improper payments, cyber security and more.

Join the conversation by tweeting #SASGOV!

Agenda

(all times EDT)

8:00 a.m. Welcome Remarks
Karen Terrell, Vice President, SAS Federal
8:15 a.m. Keynote: Cybercrime and Cyberwar
Alec Ross, former Senior Adviser for Innovation to Hillary Clinton and author
9:15 a.m. General Session: Analytics in Action
Keith Collins, Executive Vice President and Chief Information Officer, SAS
10:00 a.m. VIDEO BREAK
No Video During This Time
10:20 a.m. Panel Discussion: The Case for the Chief Data Officer
Dr. Peter Aiken, Author, The Case for the Chief Data Officer
Dr. Tyrone W A Grandison, Deputy Chief Data Officer, US Department of Commerce
Jon Minkoff, Chief Data Officer, Enforcement Bureau, Federal Communictions Commission
Moderator: Constance Sayers, President, Government Executive Media Group
11:30 a.m. VIDEO BREAK
No Video During This Time
12:15 p.m. Approachable Analytics: Put the Power of Insight in Every User’s Hands
Bernard Blais, Senior Manager, Americas Technology Practice, SAS
1:15 p.m. General Session: Reduce the Hacker’s Advantage – How to Improve Cybersecurity With Analytics
Ray Boisvert, President and CEO of I-Sec Integrated Strategies (ISECIS)
Sheldon Shaw, Cyber Analytics Specialist, SAS
2:15 p.m. Closing Remarks

Startups are an adventure and so is life

So you lived from weekends to weekends because the pay was good and the lifestyle was addictive . Then you never quit your day job, but a little voice gnawed inside your head and said with a whisper , Hey, Is there More to life. Is … there.. more?

So you got bored from your nine to nine job that was sucking out the mojo of our life and left you a TV channel zombie. Then you made a startup. Startups are so hot and everyone is the next unicorns.

But unicorns are an endangered species and are hunted for their meet and their horns. No one told you that.

The people . Oh the people.

The people you trained and promised to be with you forever. How they quit for a 30% hike. The people who held your hands and promised to help you with cash and mentorship and connections. How they smiled when they asked for 25 % of your sale and two board seats.

The lies. Oh the lies. There is no lie for giving or receiving lies for startups.

So all the angel investors died and Satan Ventures is all you have left.

Have faith. Your rebound is around the corner.

screen-shot-2015-04-08-at-11 11 22-am_1428472059

Enjoy the roller coaster.

Because a good roller coaster will always make you scream a few times.

 

 

Live like Steve Jobs but retire like Bill Gates

So okay I got your attention and it got you here.  And yes I will try to distort reality like the guru of distorted reality himself in his videotaped conferences.

I will try not to be personal about Steve’s personal life and Bill’s wealth. Give me 60 billion dollars and I will try and make the world a better place too. Give me 60 bucks and I will try and make this next hour a better place

What did Bill do better than Steve did?  He managed his mood swings better. Actually he never need to manage that at all. He managed his personal life better for sure. Bill Gates sure managed his stock option negotiations better, except I think Steve Ballmer got way too many options that he deserved which he respectfully reinvested in the tech ecosystem by buying a sports team.

20 years before Zuckerberg settled money for stealing ideas from his Harvard brothers, Bill Gates  settled dues for his cough inspired interface and actually cough cough invested in Apple. So this is not a comparison on ethics too.

NO NO NO. Steve was awesome but Bill got rich. Would you rather be rich or would rather be awesome?

Steve lived an awesome life as a rockstar techie. No one can accuse Bill Gates of living a rockstar life. I am sure the rockstars would complain.

Steve managed the ups and downs in his products much much better. Sure Lisa bombed and Macintosh boomed and NeXT was ok and Pixar was awesome and the i-series brought a tonne of money

Mac,Pod,iTunes,Phone,Pad they all started with the iCEO Steve.

Cook is no Steve Jobs. Steve Jobs didnt write many lines of code in his life but he could sell.

But Jobs got  overworked , and in the end the man became a bigger brand than his company. Bill Gates retired at 50 knowing he was handing off stuff to Ballmer who aint that Great as Gatesy , but he quit in time.

So live like Steve Jobs, but know when to quit and retire and take that money and enjoy life.

(inspired by the writing by http://lefsetz.com/wordpress/ )

 

 

Every Rose has its thorn

We both lie silently still
in the dead of the night
Although we both lie close together
We feel miles apart inside

Was it something I said or something I did
Did the words not come out right
Though I tried not to hurt you
Though I tried
But I guess that’s why they say

Chorus:
Every rose has its thorn
Just like every night has its dawn
Just like every cowboy sings his sad, sad song
Every rose has its thorn
Yeah it does

I listen to our favorite song
playing on the radio
Hear the DJ say loves a game
of easy come and easy go
But I wonder does he know
Has he ever felt like this
And I know that you’d be here somehow
If I could have let you know somehow
I guess

Chorus

Though it’s been a while now
I can still feel so much pain
Like a knife that cuts you the wound heals
but the scar, that scar remains

I know I could have saved a love that night
If I’d known what to say
Instead of makin’ love
We both made our separate ways
But now I hear you found somebody new
and that I never meant that much to you
To hear that tears me up inside
And to see you cuts me like a knife
I guess

Chorus

 

ps- Every rose has its thorn, every blogger has its horn.

Why Russia needs to enter Syrian conflict?

America has no permanent friends or enemies, only interests.

  • Henry Kissinger: The White House Years,
  1. The price of oil is shit. The Russian military industrial complex needs to boost up GDP and this can help Russian arms sales to Middle East Arab countries
  2. Replace inventory of obsolete weapons by dumping them and testing them
  3. Rehearse and collect intel on American Special Forces capabilities and Air Force capabilities including stealing technology
  4. Bond more with Iran who has also entered post their new accepted deal . Iran without nukes and without sanctions
  5. Completely take off attention over Crimean war and the sanctions there.
  6. Regain Internationational stature as a player in a multipolar world
  7. America has done a great job of handling both Iraq and Afghan conflicts so far and can be relied in a presidential lame duck tenure to avoid decisive action
  8. Tie up Assad and possibly Iran back in the WarSaw Pact (Putin edition)
  9. Boost price of oil (maybe)
  10. Kill Islamic terrorists (since they have suffered more deaths from them than all Western Country citizens combined)
  11. Test waters and capabilities for enhanced global warfare positions
  • A Single Death is a Tragedy; a Million Deaths is a Statistic

    Joseph Stalin

SYRIA-BOY-2

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